Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Have you ever missed the chance to say the right thing at the right moment? Well, that’s my whole life. How I hate those hangover moments when I come up with a brilliant punch line and exact phrases to set the stage on fire but only…only when the situation has passed by and I am left with nothing but to succumb to the lost opportunity! L

Once this colleague of mine (a very mean and competitive one) overlooked at my ppt slides and gasped on my neck screaming “who asked you to do this! This is so very irrelevant!” I humbly explained him the significance of it divulging the minute details. Then I thought, wait a minute! Why am I answering to him? I should have just said my manager asked me to do this and it’s none of your business! But did it occur to me on time? Of course not! I only thought about it when he already had his nose-poking, sinister moment!

Then there was this friend of mine who was after my life to make me visit him so that he can show me some special movie. So, one fine day I thought of visiting him (reluctantly though) and you know what, whole day I was subjected to a boring, half baked documentary esque, inferior quality cinema and to make things even worse he didn’t even offer me anything to drink or eat! I was famished by afternoon and proactively asked if we can do some home-delivery…pizza, Chinese whatever and he simply ignored my requests talking relentlessly ‘bout different things with the shady movie in the background. Finally, in the evening it was time for me to leave and he was (kind enough) to offer me a lift. On the way, he dropped by at a gas station because he had to take a leak and then asked me if I need something to eat (from the shady store at the gas station). Me? I just smiled and said “No thanks. I am good”. “Oh you aren’t feeling hungry? So you’re on diet, huh!” yeah, that’s what he said! I was so stunned at his insensitivity that I decided to just stay mum. “I’d rather starve and die than have something at 6 in the evening from that run-down store when I was starving whole day and you didn’t even care..” "Yeah, I would need some water to pour on my head!"…

Sometime back, I was at a Middle School covering for a teacher who was sick. The administrator (an old, obese, loser-like lady) handed me the lesson plans and the schedule etc with the class room direction. It turned out that all the information she provided was erratic. This teacher was supposed to teach in some other class-room and she only needed somebody for half the day. Then I was supposed to show the students an informative video and not follow those particular plans. I somewhat managed all that and visited the admin staff again once my duty was over. She gave me a big smile and said she would need me in the second half as well as I’ll have to cover two more classes. Then she gave the details of those two classes. Even this time the info was misleading. Wrong rooms, wrong assignments. After running around the hallway for half an hour, many a phone calls and talking to a lot of teachers in the vicinity I figured it all out. After the grueling day was over, when I was signing out the old lady gave me an apologetic smile and said that she was sorry about all the chaos. I melted instantly and said in zest “No problem. Happens. I had fun exploring the building…”. And then, hold your breath, she said “You’re lucky, we are gonna pay you anyhow!” Oh yeah? I just gave her an amused look and walked away. Gosh, I could have said “Oh I was just trying to overlook your callousness but I guess you don’t deserve it!” or "You're lucky too that they won't pay me from your salary!"If only I could have said that right then!!!